2 Timothy 1:11-12

2 Timothy 1:11-12  And of this gospel I was appointed a herald and an apostle and a teacher.  That is why I am suffering as I am.  Yet I am not ashamed, because I know whom I have believed, and am convinced that he is able to guard what I have entrusted to him for that day.

Jeremiah 20: 9  But if I say, “I will not mention him or speak any more in his name,” his word is in my heart like a fire, a fire shut up in my bones. I am weary of holding it in; indeed, I cannot.  

2 Corinthians 6:4-10  Rather, as servants of God we commend ourselves in every way: in great endurance; in troubles, hardships and distresses; in beatings, imprisonments and riots; in hard work, sleepless nights and hunger; in purity, understanding, patience and kindness; in the Holy Spirit and in sincere love; in truthful speech and in the power of God; with weapons of righteousness in the right hand and in the left; through glory and dishonor, bad report and good report; genuine, yet regarded as impostors; known, yet regarded as unknown; dying, and yet we live on; beaten, and yet not killed; sorrowful, yet always rejoicing; poor, yet making many rich; having nothing, and yet possessing everything. 

Many people desire to be leaders, ministers, teachers in the household of God, but this scripture in Timothy reveals these servants suffer much to fulfill their positions in the body of Christ.  Almost no one who is in position of authority or influence in the household of God escapes the pressures of leadership and the attacks of the devil if God's work is done.  Ministry is not just a desire to lead, to expound, to teach the Word, to save souls; it is something that captivates one's total being.  Consequently, as Paul relates, hardships, anxieties, and persecutions will not deter a minister from fulfilling his or her role.  We are as Jeremiah with a fire in his bones: he cannot keep quiet, he cannot hold his tongue. His every thought, experience, and activity is evaluated to see how it might be used by the Holy Spirit to elucidate God's Word, to win souls.  A servant who is chosen to implement the Word, to lead, and to seek the lost will not fulfill his or her mission in some cloistered hideaway.  No, such a servant will be put in the frontlines.  Many times his or her position will be overrun by the enemy, many times he or she will fall back wounded, many times this faithful servant will wonder which side is winning.  A minister is always on the frontline, always in battle, and will have the scars to prove it.   

Paul said that he has entrusted much to the Lord.  He has allowed himself to be thrown into the thick of the battle.  He has seen all of his supporting cast abandon him in Asia.  Paul knows what it is to be alone and fighting the good fight. He knows what it is to be overrun by the enemy, but he says that he is convinced that God is able keep his ministry viable, alive.  He is convinced that he (God) is able to guard what I have entrusted to him for that day.  Paul's ministry will remain, bear fruit.  After 2,000 years we know that Paul's ministry has endured.  Now, even in our time, we gain strength and encouragement because of his divinely inspired ministry.  However, whether Paul's ministry would have lasted or not, he would have been faithful to his calling.  He had to fulfill the mission God gave him, for the Lord told him, "I have made you an apostle, a teacher of many, a spiritual father to the Gentiles."  Every servant of the Most High is called in the same way to fulfill a specific and unique mission in life.  Everyone must be faithful to that eternal and holy calling.

For almost fifty years I have been teaching the Word, and every time I get discouraged and want to quit, the Lord tells me, "I made you a teacher.  I have placed my words into your mouth."  Sometimes I feel how audacious of me.  My words are no more inspired than anyone else's.  I feel as if I am just blowing in the wind, and no one is listening.  I think, “I will not mention him or speak any more in his name.”  I will not write another email.  However, at those times I realize his word is in my heart like a fire, a fire shut up in my bones.  Indeed, I cannot hold it in.  Servants have no other choice but to fulfill the mission God has given to them.  Not all are leaders, ministers, teachers, prophets, healers, but everyone has a special calling, a mission.  If you have a fire burning in your bones, if you hear God's voice calling you to speak, to lead, you should do it.  If you have a fire in your bones, a special anointing to help, to provide, to care, to give hospitality, to interact, to love children, to visit the sick, you should do it.  Nothing else will appease your spirit.  Nothing else will please God.  But do nothing out of vanity or a desire to magnify self.  If you do anything for fleshly purposes, you barter the special gift of God for your own self-willed desires, which will eventually lead to death.  Christ alone should be lifted up in our lives.  When I retired from teaching, a co-worker gave me a plaque with this scripture: My teaching is not my own.  It comes from him who sent me.  This friend knew my heart and my desire.  I think of these oft quoted words: Only one life, will soon be past.  Only what's done for Christ will last.